A lesson in humility

We worship such an intelligent, wise God. That's sort of a broad statement, so let me narrow it down a little as it pertains to my life, particularly recently. First of all, I should note that my journey in the past few years has been quite different than my brother's, and that is a fact that has caused me distress, and even guilt at times. You see, he went straight from college to grad school, did wonderfully, married the first and only girl he ever dated, landed a great job, bought a house and puppy, had 2 kids, and... well, you get the picture. Me, on the other hand? I went to the same university as he did (best in the nation... ok, maybe I'm a bit biased), but after graduating, I jetted off to Spain for the entire summer (I should also note that I'm the first in my family to leave the country, save a short family vacation to Canada). It was one of the best summers of my life, and before going, I was intent on becoming a lawyer. Yep, I'd been admitted to law school, had an apartment with a couple of girls, was to start in the fall, the whole shebang. And then Spain happened, and changed the course of my life. I think that's how it always is, isn't it? Such a beautiful, captivating country like that can do nothing less than leave a lasting footprint on your life. For me, that took the form of dropping out of law school before I'd even started, with the intention of moving back to Spain. Oh, but God had other plans... it reminds me of that quote, how does it go? Oh yes: "If you want to see God laugh, tell him your plans." Indeed, I'm sure God got a chuckle out of ME telling HIM that I was moving back to Spain.

I'm a firm believer that God has a sense of humor. And instead of sending me back to the land of lisping Spanish accents and some of the most amazing architecture I'd ever seen, he led me to a place I never would have suspected: Santiago, Chile. I'll be perfectly honest - when I first visited Santiago, in August of 2006, I hated it. It was rainy and cold, and there was almost NO central heating to be found. But, long story made extremely, extremely short, I fell head-over-heels in love with Santiago, with Chile in general, and with the Chilean people. That country resonates deep in my heart today. You know that saying, "you can take the girl out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the girl"? Well, no one could ever, ever take Chile out of me. It's permanently etched in my mind, my heart, my soul. But I messed up, I chose a fleeting relationship over the work God had called me to do in Chile, and so I now find myself on a different path. A path that ultimately led to Wilmington, North Carolina, and to me meeting the love of my life. You see, God is a God of second chances. A God of grace. And I now find myself so grateful that I feel I should be permanently on my knees in prayer to him, for showing me such grace and mercy, and for blessing me with a second chance at the abundant life he promised.

Right now, I'm working at a job that is less than satisfying, but with the plan (ahhh, there's that tricky word again!) to start grad school soon, pursuing a Masters in Social Work. The thought excites me, and I can't wait to start, but right now I spend my days working at a job I dislike, and making very little money. But this is where God's wisdom again comes in... he knows me well, and he must have known I needed to be taught about humility, and that is certainly what I have been learning in the past year or so. I have had to depend on people like never before, particularly my family, and ask for money from people I never wanted to. I have indeed had to humble myself, and let me tell you... a lesson in humility is never an easy one. We live in a world where humility does not come naturally, nor is it really encouraged. But God, the all-powerful God of the universe, came to earth as a little baby. Does it really get more humble than that? And if he did that, the least I can do is bow before him and acknowledge that it is he who should be exalted above all. Even as I write that, I wonder if my life really reflects that. Actually, in thinking about my job, my job title is "server"... oh, the irony. So... what? I've learned what it means to serve other people when I'm being paid for it, or because I am being forced to do so... but do I really know what it means to serve others, and serve God, because I truly WANT to? At first glance, the idea of serving God may seem like a contradiction... that is, the Bible speaks many times about the FREEDOM we have in Christ, that we are no longer slaves... yes, but read on... we are no longer slaves to SIN. We are indeed free, but that freedom is a call to experience abundant life, as followers of Christ, and as servants of him. Not servants that are chained down and forced to serve an uncaring master - but servants who freely humble themselves in the pursuit of exalting the Creator of the universe.

I couldn't think of a more satisfying pursuit.